During the process of aggregating my race reports from the first half of 2013, I did my best to highlight what I felt were some of the most important themes, things to keep in mind, etc. While every individual is so unique, I think many of these ideas could be applicable to a pretty broad range of athletes. Take em or leave em!
Always focus on bettering/beating yourself, and let the chips fall where they may on race day. The only thing you can control is your performance and how you react to the field. If you are feeling like crap out there, odds are everyone else is too so never be judgmental during a race. There is an enormous difference between 'finishing' a half ironman and 'racing' a half ironman; be prepared to make this desicion about a mile into the run, and understand the consequences of choosing the former and the potential for regret associated with it. The swim is no longer [and perhaps never was] marginalized in the half ironman distance; it's now easy to swim 'effectively' and still give up 4-7 minutes; pool time is often hard to come by for many age-groupers, but may provide the greatest net return. While it is very important to be specific in key workout sessions, sometimes the emotional gains from training with a group outweigh any exact specificity, and I find this especially true in longer workouts; in these situations, evaluate the overarching 'purpose' of a workout. For instance, if you have 4x30 minutes at 90% FTP baked into a 4 hour ride, the purpose of that workout is probably to go out and 'ride your bike hard,' but without totally killing yourself. You can accomplish this in a group of the right athletes, even if it means a slight deviation from that exact main set. "Success is doing everything you could the right way and saying man, I did the best I could - that's success." - Aries Merritt (The full interview is here and gold if you have the time)
Material geared toward amateur endurance athletes. Main topics focus on physical and mental fitness, philosophy and culture of sport, and the lifestyle considerations of a serious age-group athlete.
This space is dedicated to the world of endurance sports. Although the focus is on Triathlon, the content has broad applicability, touching on subjects that are highly relevant to all endurance athletes from distance runners to rowers; pretty much all of the suffer sports. In addition to writing about this stuff, I compete too. If you are interested in learning more about me, browsing my writing that has been published on Xtri, or reading about some of my own athletic endeavors, just click on any of the tabs above.
Showing posts with label Life of an Age-Grouper. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life of an Age-Grouper. Show all posts
Friday, July 26, 2013
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
Sponsorship of Amateur Athletes
The topic of “sponsorship” in multisport has been discussed
repeatedly across venues from magazines to forums ever since I became active in
the sport(s) some three years ago. There
is a lot of variability in thinking/feeling (the latter being more decisive) on
the topic, and for what it’s worth, I figured I would share my thoughts based on recent experiences working with a small number of
companies in the industry:
Yes, I am an amateur athlete (e.g., I do not have a pro
card) and am "sponsored" by a few companies...although I do not like
to think of the arrangement as a "sponsorship" but more of a
partnership or symbiotic relationship. I can't say what it is like among
the pro ranks because I do not know, but I can say way too many amateurs have a
mindset that they are super-fast, finish well, and therefore companies should
be sending them free and/or heavily discounted product. In my opinion, this
just isn't how it works. For one, in this day and age, way too many guys are
super-fast and finish well so "standing out" because of good results
is likely harder to do than it was in the past. And far more
important, results are just one dimension of a total athlete that matter to
companies, and for many companies in the industry, results may fall behind other
things such as: prevalence and reputation in the multisport community,
knowledge about their brand and product(s), and motivation and skills to communicate.
Sure, maybe some folks will see a logo on Craig Alexander's kit/blog and decide to try a product because of it, but unless you are Craig Alexander, even if you are killing it in
the AG ranks, generally a conversation occurs about a logo on your kit/blog
prior to someone trying it. So yes, while results matter, they are just part of
the equation, and if anything, more often than not a conduit to shine as a spokesperson.
In my partnerships, I am so fortunate to get...comped and/or discounted product
from the companies that I partner with, and I think this is the case for many
age-groupers as I don't know of a single amateur who is getting cash, and it is my
understanding that even just a minority of pros have cash sponsorship deals. Going into
details about these arrangements would actually go against the spirit of a true
partnership since to companies, athlete partners are likely thought of as parts of a broader marketing toolkit, and no companies that I know of openly share their marketing
strategies with each other.
What I give...is a combination of multiple things that
hopefully work together to help my partners out much like they help me out.
First and foremost, I give an honest opinion about the products, and only use
them if I think they work. Athletes that chase deals because they think it
"sounds cool to be sponsored" makes *no sense* to me and epitomizes
the sometimes negative stereotype thrown at triathletes. So the first thing I
give is an endearing personal endorsement of a product because I use it and
believe it works. After and because of that true personal endorsement and belief
in the product(s), I share my experience with others in the triathlon community
that could benefit and think of myself as an ambassador/spokesperson [in my
triathlon circle, which is different from Craig Alexander's] for the companies
I partner with. This involves writing product reviews and small-talk at my Masters
swim group, on group rides, and at the track. As you'll see on my blog, I also post links to company websites, and use other social
media vehicles (e.g., Facebook and Twitter) to help get the word out about
these products. Finally, I wear their logo's on my body (e.g., on my Kit) at
races, and strive for great results. That said, and as I mention above, I don't
think anyone has ever tried out a product because they saw the logo on my
uniform, but multiple people have asked me about a product because of this...which gets to the role of the importance of being a good spokesperson.
As an aside from helping in a marketing/branding role (as
outlined above) I also try to act as a product-development and strategy
consultant, constantly giving feedback on products (both based on my experience
and what I am hearing from others) and also offering business ideas that are
spurred from what I observe day-to-day "in the field." It's so great to
work with companies that really value this type of engagement too, as some of
these ideas have lead to a website re-design, new newsletter generation, etc.,
etc. Truth be told, I don't think I would be nearly as much of an asset to companies that didn't engage with their athletes in this manner.
So, to make a long story short, it's all about a partnership
and mutually beneficial relationships, and as an athlete, it is important to see results as just
a part of the equation. Make no mistake, when I evaluate myself as an athlete
about the only thing that matters is how fast I go on race day...but when I
evaluate myself as a brand ambassador, this is one factor among many. The good
news is, I don't think very many companies look down upon good results...so the
two most certainly go hand-in-hand.
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Triathlon in a Job Interview, and an Interesting Turn to Divorce Rates in Triathlon
As Featured on Xtri.
In a recent job interview with top executives of a multi-billion dollar organization, my competition in endurance sports became the topic of discussion. Given that I am in my final year of a graduate degree, I have been interviewing quite often, and am no longer surprised when this happens...because it almost always does. The conversation generally follows a common trajectory; awe ("wow, it is so amazing that you do this"), to genuine interest ("so, tell me more about the Duathlon World Championships"), to the relevance of multisport in professional settings (e.g., goal-setting, data tracking, measurement, and strategic planning). But this particular interview took a turn for the interesting when I was asked, "There is all kinds of literature out there about high divorce rates with triathletes, what do you think about that?"
Not gonna lie, I was thrown slightly off-guard, but after I got over my initial reaction [whoa, pretty ballsy question], I told him exactly what I thought:
Not gonna lie, I was thrown slightly off-guard, but after I got over my initial reaction [whoa, pretty ballsy question], I told him exactly what I thought:
- Yes, it's disturbing that triathletes get divorced, and well the subject is highly publicized, nowhere have I ever seen that the number is truly greater that then [50%] of all marriages that unfortunately end in divorce.
- Much like participation in any other individual passion, in the context of a relationship, communication, planning, and probably more than anything, trade-offs are key. I went on to tell the panel of interviewers that I almost never attend University of Michigan football games (I am a grad Student at U of M, where football is as big as anything). They all looked at me like I was from another planet. I explained that I generally need to get in a weekly long workout, and if I were to spend 4 hours at the football game and 4 hours in the saddle, I probably wouldn't have much time for anything else; be it work or a relationship; basically, you can't have your cake and eat it too. If I am going to train for half the day, I realize that I may not be able to watch football with the guys for the other half.
- I then brought up golf, and my (although admittedly vague) familiarity is that many corporate executives may play a few rounds per week. 6 hours a round x 2.5 rounds a week and there you have a decently high volume [15 hours] training week. This insight seemed to really strike a chord with the group.
- Finally, I helped them realize that the divorce rate they read about is only one side of the coin. In my relationship, the power of endurance sport has been almost all positive. Even though she is not a triathlete (or duathlete for that matter), as a result of partaking in this culture, my girlfriend and I are extremely active, eat healthy, and are totally in touch with our bodies. Although we may not spend too many late nights at the bar, we have a great social life, are embedded in a wonderful community of other people that value a similar lifestyle, and we actually think that spending a Friday night eating a box of Cookie Crisp Cereal over a rental movie is pretty incredible...so we can wake up feeling good for our long workouts the next morning (although after an entire box, feeling OK may be more appropriate).
So, when triathlon inevitably surfaces in your next interview (or any professional conversation for that matter), odds are you'll get to speak to the fact that your swim/bike/run performance evaluation system is actually pretty similar to that of IBM's business tracking. But, in the event that things get interesting, it's good to think through both sides of the coin...and more importantly, to make sure that you are comfortable with your own answer for reasons far more important than getting the job.
Saturday, July 2, 2011
Making Training Work: Thoughts from Near-Elites that are "Pro" at Something Other than Multisport
It’s fitting that I’m pulling this post together on a flight back to Detroit for a wedding in my girlfriend’s family…after a half-day of work…after a 4-hour brick workout that started around 4:30AM. I won’t have my bike in Michigan, nor the time for such a long training session, but it was a critical workout that had to get done, and it got done. I’ll still train this weekend, but nothing nearly that long, and the focus will be on family and friends, not my cadence while climbing.
While I’ve written about finding “balance” before [http://bradstrainingupdate.blogspot.com/2011/02/balancing-training-with-other-things-in.html], the broader topic of making multisport training [and more generally, the lifestyle] work with other commitments is one that seems never to go away; constantly brought up on long group rides, in magazines, and recently, even in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal. Given the significance of and interest in this topic in our community, rather than giving additional thoughts of my own, I decided to take a “crowed source” approach. I asked over 30 near-elite [we aren’t talking weekend warriors, but athletes that constantly win their age-group and often find themselves on overall podiums] individuals that are “pro” at something other than multisport* how they make training at such a high level [often between 15-20 hours a week] work. The results, in their own words, are below. This is a long one, but probably the most insightful and useful stuff that has ever been up on this page. Go figure, it’s the one thing I didn’t write!
“I think it can be a very destructive sport and I’ve been aware of that from day one. I’ve always had my wife’s support. I’ve watched friends and training partners go from training, to sitting around, watching TV to jumping on Facebook, to having a stretch, then back to Facebook. That’s not how I spend my time. I think when you have other commitments, you need to be regimented, get things in order and get things done….I also always try to include my family in some way.”
“The balance is a lot of planning and communicating. But overall it comes down to the family understanding what I do. But also me understanding what I need to do…which is get up early a lot and get it done. Sleeping in and rolling out for a mid-morning bike ride on a weekend is unacceptable.”“I don’t golf, I don’t play poker, and I probably make $20K less than my full earnings potential. But I’m a hell of a lot healthier, wiser, happier, and a better example to my children for it.”
“It’s deciding how you want to spend your time. I am content with a mediocre social life and very few activities that don’t involve working out. The more you put into something the more you will get out, it works for training, relationships, and life. To put more in somewhere one usually has to take some out somewhere else.”
“I teach 6th grade, am getting my masters at night, have certain Teach for America obligations, a relationship, and train a lot. Everything is scheduled, and I try my best to stick to it. I also have a plan where I know what races to prioritize…I sync those up when the timing with everything else is right.”
“Quality over quantity. Use the trainer.”
“I have a very supportive and understanding husband, and I am constantly re-evaluating the balance of more training time to get faster and more competitive-and the importance of that. I would rather be an elite wife and mother than an elite athlete”
“I like to combine family outings with a workout. I will ride to my in-laws, meet the family in town.”
“It helps to have family that is supportive of the individual who is pursuing a multisport lifestyle, so they can operate in a more functional and progressive manner. Trying to balance graduate studies and doctoral internships, military training and deployments, and family life is a never-ending balancing act. I try to give the proper attention to each aspect of my life. It’s not easy, but as the time goes on you begin to realize how to fine-tune what aspects in your life need more attention, just like in multisport, when after a certain amount of time you begin to realize what aspects/disciplines of the sport you need to give more attention and fine-tuning to. We choose multisport because it pushes the mind and the body and allows us to feel the gift of life, in its most honest and natural state.”
“I have been EXTREMELY fortunate to be dating a girl that understands the dynamics of a competitive athlete, such as me. I have also been extremely successful in surrounding myself with people who both understand and admire what I do- and that's half the battle of making it work.”
“I do jeopardize other aspects of my life. My friends in the department constantly ask me if I want to go out for a pitcher or something on the weekends, but I always have to turn them down because I'm getting up early to roll on the Blue Ridge Mountains. It's just the kind of sacrifice that you have to make. You have to surround yourself with people who "get it", and the rest will take care of itself.”
“Planning and communication is key. At the start of every week, my wife knows when my workouts are, and if they don’t “work out,” then they are adjusted. Getting 15 hours in a week actually isn’t that tough at all, so long as you find the right 15 hours. That is a joint effort.”
“This sport is my Soma. You can get me at 70% 100% of the time, or 100% 95% of the time.”
“Yeah, it’s an addiction, but I see those that end their nights with 1-2 hours of TV on the couch just as addicted. And while mine may cost more now, when I hit 65, 70, it will cost a lot less”
“I’m not really sure how it works, to be honest. It would probably be easier to be a pro, but that’s just not realistic for me. It’s tough to be too good to do this casually, but not good enough to do it full time. But at the end of the day, even in monster weeks, finding 25 hours is feasible. Whether or not it will always be (I don’t yet have kids) I can’t say.”
I hope that you found this as thought-provoking and insightful as I did.
Until next time, Train hard, live hard!
*I include just one quote from a pro, which is the first one; I found it quite good.
While I’ve written about finding “balance” before [http://bradstrainingupdate.blogspot.com/2011/02/balancing-training-with-other-things-in.html], the broader topic of making multisport training [and more generally, the lifestyle] work with other commitments is one that seems never to go away; constantly brought up on long group rides, in magazines, and recently, even in the New York Times and Wall Street Journal. Given the significance of and interest in this topic in our community, rather than giving additional thoughts of my own, I decided to take a “crowed source” approach. I asked over 30 near-elite [we aren’t talking weekend warriors, but athletes that constantly win their age-group and often find themselves on overall podiums] individuals that are “pro” at something other than multisport* how they make training at such a high level [often between 15-20 hours a week] work. The results, in their own words, are below. This is a long one, but probably the most insightful and useful stuff that has ever been up on this page. Go figure, it’s the one thing I didn’t write!
“I think it can be a very destructive sport and I’ve been aware of that from day one. I’ve always had my wife’s support. I’ve watched friends and training partners go from training, to sitting around, watching TV to jumping on Facebook, to having a stretch, then back to Facebook. That’s not how I spend my time. I think when you have other commitments, you need to be regimented, get things in order and get things done….I also always try to include my family in some way.”
“The balance is a lot of planning and communicating. But overall it comes down to the family understanding what I do. But also me understanding what I need to do…which is get up early a lot and get it done. Sleeping in and rolling out for a mid-morning bike ride on a weekend is unacceptable.”“I don’t golf, I don’t play poker, and I probably make $20K less than my full earnings potential. But I’m a hell of a lot healthier, wiser, happier, and a better example to my children for it.”
“It’s deciding how you want to spend your time. I am content with a mediocre social life and very few activities that don’t involve working out. The more you put into something the more you will get out, it works for training, relationships, and life. To put more in somewhere one usually has to take some out somewhere else.”
“I teach 6th grade, am getting my masters at night, have certain Teach for America obligations, a relationship, and train a lot. Everything is scheduled, and I try my best to stick to it. I also have a plan where I know what races to prioritize…I sync those up when the timing with everything else is right.”
“Quality over quantity. Use the trainer.”
“I have a very supportive and understanding husband, and I am constantly re-evaluating the balance of more training time to get faster and more competitive-and the importance of that. I would rather be an elite wife and mother than an elite athlete”
“I like to combine family outings with a workout. I will ride to my in-laws, meet the family in town.”
“It helps to have family that is supportive of the individual who is pursuing a multisport lifestyle, so they can operate in a more functional and progressive manner. Trying to balance graduate studies and doctoral internships, military training and deployments, and family life is a never-ending balancing act. I try to give the proper attention to each aspect of my life. It’s not easy, but as the time goes on you begin to realize how to fine-tune what aspects in your life need more attention, just like in multisport, when after a certain amount of time you begin to realize what aspects/disciplines of the sport you need to give more attention and fine-tuning to. We choose multisport because it pushes the mind and the body and allows us to feel the gift of life, in its most honest and natural state.”
“I have been EXTREMELY fortunate to be dating a girl that understands the dynamics of a competitive athlete, such as me. I have also been extremely successful in surrounding myself with people who both understand and admire what I do- and that's half the battle of making it work.”
“I do jeopardize other aspects of my life. My friends in the department constantly ask me if I want to go out for a pitcher or something on the weekends, but I always have to turn them down because I'm getting up early to roll on the Blue Ridge Mountains. It's just the kind of sacrifice that you have to make. You have to surround yourself with people who "get it", and the rest will take care of itself.”
“Planning and communication is key. At the start of every week, my wife knows when my workouts are, and if they don’t “work out,” then they are adjusted. Getting 15 hours in a week actually isn’t that tough at all, so long as you find the right 15 hours. That is a joint effort.”
“This sport is my Soma. You can get me at 70% 100% of the time, or 100% 95% of the time.”
“Yeah, it’s an addiction, but I see those that end their nights with 1-2 hours of TV on the couch just as addicted. And while mine may cost more now, when I hit 65, 70, it will cost a lot less”
“I’m not really sure how it works, to be honest. It would probably be easier to be a pro, but that’s just not realistic for me. It’s tough to be too good to do this casually, but not good enough to do it full time. But at the end of the day, even in monster weeks, finding 25 hours is feasible. Whether or not it will always be (I don’t yet have kids) I can’t say.”
I hope that you found this as thought-provoking and insightful as I did.
Until next time, Train hard, live hard!
*I include just one quote from a pro, which is the first one; I found it quite good.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Balancing Training with Other Things in Life
I recently read a short article titled "How to date a Triathlete." While it was nothing way too insightful (and I'm easier to date, because I have cut the swim out for now) it did lead me to reflect on a common theme, or even call it a concern, among non-professional multisport athletes. Simply put, how do we balance training with the rest of life. In my opinion, this is a challenge for two main reasons:
1) Improvement and success in multisport racing takes a lot of time, and the better one gets, the more time improvement takes [there are diminishing marginal returns to training]. A simple example: it is much easier to go from a 4 hour marathon to a 3:45 marathon than it is to go from a 3:15 marathon to a 3 hour marathon. One can get into a pretty vicious (or virtuous, depends on your perspective) cycle of needing to train more in order to continuously improve. When it comes to multisport racing, just maintaining fitness across 2/3 disciplines takes a lot of time, and the better you get, the more training is needed to make gains.
2) Endurance training is addictive. Just google it if you want more serious/scientific information, but in short, the physiological release of endorphins and dopamine brought about by intense and ritualized aerobic exercise is only topped by sex and drug use. Not to mention, the psychological thrill of pushing oneself and transforming one's body in the pursuit of very tangible goals is also [in my opinion, at least] somewhat, if not fully addictive.
I don't think either of the reasons above should carry a negative connotation, if anything, I believe they are both quite positive. The personal growth that comes with improving at something that is challenging is good, and of all the things to give you a "pick me up," physical exertion isn't a bad one - I'd actually say its a pretty good one, and we just may be programmed for it. If Darwin were still alive, he would remind us that we didn't evolve to sit around all day. That said, there are some risks [outside of the health/ performance consequences of physical over training] brought about by our passion. These "risks" or maybe more appropriately stated, "concerns," are pretty personal and depend a lot on one's own environment [e.g., significant other gets mad at you, if you are a parent you may not be spending enough time with kids, not performing well at work, not sleeping enough, etc, etc -- you get the point]. I think we [multisport athletes] all can easily identify a few in our own lives, I know I can. To that end, I'll offer my perspective around good ways to approach this challenge by sharing some things that have generally worked well for me.
Be honest with yourself: If you love the sport more than anything, you might want to think about pursuing the sport more than anything. This doesn't necessarily mean trying to become a pro; there are plenty of ways you can make multisport your life. I have good friends of all ages that work at running stores, coach athletes, and yes, even some continplating going for the pro-card. All these folks are really happy. For them, "balance" would be stupid. If multisport is your calling, go for it. You get in more trouble if you deny it, lying to yourself and lying to others. That said, if this isn't your absolute calling, but you still really really love it (yours truly), then...
Communicate with important people in your life: Let them know how and why you love training and racing. I often say that if there are 112 waking hours in the week, you can get 112 hours of me at 70%, or you can get 95ish hours of me at 100%. It then becomes pretty easy for those that care about me to understand, and much easier for me to be fully present and give that 100% when I am not training.
Don't meet people at the bar: If you are dating people who love late nights and alcohol, this should raise a few red flags. If you're dating someone whose idea of a fun night is cooking a great dinner, going to a movie/show and going to bed on the early side so you can go on a great hike in the morning, then you'll probably be happier in the long run. Not sure if I'm getting the point across, but be yourself early and often when meeting others. For those that are married, I have no personal advice, though I'm sure the communication point (above) is pretty huge.
Involve [significant] others in your training, and care about their "training" whatever it may be: If you are yourself with others early and often [see above], then you'll probably end up surrounding yourself with people who share common interest to yours. They don't have to be exact. For example, Caitlin [best girlfriend] is also the best race-walker [it's actually insane]. Although we can't do our workouts together, we can prep for them, work to start/end them at the same time, enjoy brunch/dinner after them together, and even schedule long rides and long walks on the same day, so we can melt away on the couch with each other later that afternoon and evening.
Set just-manageable challenges: Set goals that not only align to your current physical condition, but also your time boundaries. If you evaluate your job/school, family, friends, etc and come out knowing you only have 10 hours a week to train, you probably won't win an Ironman, so don't aim to. It's ok to dream, but don't be delusional. Important note here, I'm not suggesting winning Kona is delusional at all..it's only delusional if you try to train up to win Kona while working for a law firm, active in three book clubs, and in a band...you get the point [go back to my first piece of advice, if you want to make this the center of your life, just do it]
Compartmentalize training: When I'm on the bike or running, I'm on the bike or running (with the exception of some multi-tasking on the trainer). Equally important, when I'm off the bike, then I'm off the bike. I love my training sessions when I'm doing them, but when they end, then they end. When it's time to focus on school, I focus on school. When it's time to be with someone special, you better bet that's what, and all, I'm doing. Full disclosure here, I'm quite against multi-tasking on the whole. I don't care how good you are at it, you would be better and have more quality experiences if you were just doing one thing. Sometimes this isn't possible, but I try to create space to make sure that when I'm doing something, that's all I'm doing
Plan balance: There is nothing zen and magical about any of the above. I think the most critical thing is to be honest with yourself, think about what you want to do, and set a plan for doing it. Right now, being in graduate school, I know I have the time, resouces, and body to accomplish certain goals, so I am going for them. I also know that in a few years, that mix will change [enter: job in health care and a desire to change health care, potential children, changing body, etc]. By being aware of how training and racing fits into a more broader and integrated path, you'll avoid so many blind-sides and blow-ups, and you'll be more apt and able to realize when you need to make a change, whether that change is dropping everything and moving to Montana to train full time, or moving back from Montana to work in some corporate job [those are extremes, but there is an enormous and pragmattic grey area in between]
All of this is just my opinion, and not the "right" answer by any means. Hopefully I at least got you thinking about what the "right" answer might look like for you!
Train hard, Live hard!
1) Improvement and success in multisport racing takes a lot of time, and the better one gets, the more time improvement takes [there are diminishing marginal returns to training]. A simple example: it is much easier to go from a 4 hour marathon to a 3:45 marathon than it is to go from a 3:15 marathon to a 3 hour marathon. One can get into a pretty vicious (or virtuous, depends on your perspective) cycle of needing to train more in order to continuously improve. When it comes to multisport racing, just maintaining fitness across 2/3 disciplines takes a lot of time, and the better you get, the more training is needed to make gains.
2) Endurance training is addictive. Just google it if you want more serious/scientific information, but in short, the physiological release of endorphins and dopamine brought about by intense and ritualized aerobic exercise is only topped by sex and drug use. Not to mention, the psychological thrill of pushing oneself and transforming one's body in the pursuit of very tangible goals is also [in my opinion, at least] somewhat, if not fully addictive.
I don't think either of the reasons above should carry a negative connotation, if anything, I believe they are both quite positive. The personal growth that comes with improving at something that is challenging is good, and of all the things to give you a "pick me up," physical exertion isn't a bad one - I'd actually say its a pretty good one, and we just may be programmed for it. If Darwin were still alive, he would remind us that we didn't evolve to sit around all day. That said, there are some risks [outside of the health/ performance consequences of physical over training] brought about by our passion. These "risks" or maybe more appropriately stated, "concerns," are pretty personal and depend a lot on one's own environment [e.g., significant other gets mad at you, if you are a parent you may not be spending enough time with kids, not performing well at work, not sleeping enough, etc, etc -- you get the point]. I think we [multisport athletes] all can easily identify a few in our own lives, I know I can. To that end, I'll offer my perspective around good ways to approach this challenge by sharing some things that have generally worked well for me.
Be honest with yourself: If you love the sport more than anything, you might want to think about pursuing the sport more than anything. This doesn't necessarily mean trying to become a pro; there are plenty of ways you can make multisport your life. I have good friends of all ages that work at running stores, coach athletes, and yes, even some continplating going for the pro-card. All these folks are really happy. For them, "balance" would be stupid. If multisport is your calling, go for it. You get in more trouble if you deny it, lying to yourself and lying to others. That said, if this isn't your absolute calling, but you still really really love it (yours truly), then...
Communicate with important people in your life: Let them know how and why you love training and racing. I often say that if there are 112 waking hours in the week, you can get 112 hours of me at 70%, or you can get 95ish hours of me at 100%. It then becomes pretty easy for those that care about me to understand, and much easier for me to be fully present and give that 100% when I am not training.
Don't meet people at the bar: If you are dating people who love late nights and alcohol, this should raise a few red flags. If you're dating someone whose idea of a fun night is cooking a great dinner, going to a movie/show and going to bed on the early side so you can go on a great hike in the morning, then you'll probably be happier in the long run. Not sure if I'm getting the point across, but be yourself early and often when meeting others. For those that are married, I have no personal advice, though I'm sure the communication point (above) is pretty huge.
Involve [significant] others in your training, and care about their "training" whatever it may be: If you are yourself with others early and often [see above], then you'll probably end up surrounding yourself with people who share common interest to yours. They don't have to be exact. For example, Caitlin [best girlfriend] is also the best race-walker [it's actually insane]. Although we can't do our workouts together, we can prep for them, work to start/end them at the same time, enjoy brunch/dinner after them together, and even schedule long rides and long walks on the same day, so we can melt away on the couch with each other later that afternoon and evening.
Set just-manageable challenges: Set goals that not only align to your current physical condition, but also your time boundaries. If you evaluate your job/school, family, friends, etc and come out knowing you only have 10 hours a week to train, you probably won't win an Ironman, so don't aim to. It's ok to dream, but don't be delusional. Important note here, I'm not suggesting winning Kona is delusional at all..it's only delusional if you try to train up to win Kona while working for a law firm, active in three book clubs, and in a band...you get the point [go back to my first piece of advice, if you want to make this the center of your life, just do it]
Compartmentalize training: When I'm on the bike or running, I'm on the bike or running (with the exception of some multi-tasking on the trainer). Equally important, when I'm off the bike, then I'm off the bike. I love my training sessions when I'm doing them, but when they end, then they end. When it's time to focus on school, I focus on school. When it's time to be with someone special, you better bet that's what, and all, I'm doing. Full disclosure here, I'm quite against multi-tasking on the whole. I don't care how good you are at it, you would be better and have more quality experiences if you were just doing one thing. Sometimes this isn't possible, but I try to create space to make sure that when I'm doing something, that's all I'm doing
Plan balance: There is nothing zen and magical about any of the above. I think the most critical thing is to be honest with yourself, think about what you want to do, and set a plan for doing it. Right now, being in graduate school, I know I have the time, resouces, and body to accomplish certain goals, so I am going for them. I also know that in a few years, that mix will change [enter: job in health care and a desire to change health care, potential children, changing body, etc]. By being aware of how training and racing fits into a more broader and integrated path, you'll avoid so many blind-sides and blow-ups, and you'll be more apt and able to realize when you need to make a change, whether that change is dropping everything and moving to Montana to train full time, or moving back from Montana to work in some corporate job [those are extremes, but there is an enormous and pragmattic grey area in between]
All of this is just my opinion, and not the "right" answer by any means. Hopefully I at least got you thinking about what the "right" answer might look like for you!
Train hard, Live hard!
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